Barbatii Sunt de pe Marte, Femeile Sunt de pe Venus

April 5th, 2008

mars-venusMen Are from Mars, Women Are from Venus…iata o carte care m-a facut sa imi doresc sa am sansa de a urca in varful unui munte si sa strig cu toata puterea “Cititi aceasta carte!!”, astfel incat sa fiu auzita pretutindeni. De ce? Pentru ca sunt absolut convinsa de faptul ca daca fiecare persoana din lume ar citi aceasta carte, lumea ar fi mult mai buna si relatiile dintre barbati si femei mult mai pline de armonie si iubire. Si de ce nu sunt asa relatiile dintre noi? De ce acest inutil razboi intre sexe? Pentru ca fara constientizarea faptului ca suntem meniti sa fim diferiti unii de altii, spune Dr. John Gray, autorul acestei carti, se isca tot felul de conflicte absolut inutile intre femei si barbati.

 

Oricat de mult ne-am iubi, aceste conflicte sunt extrem de greu de evitat daca nu reusim sa constientizam diferentele esentiale dintre noi. Ne asteptam ca partenerii nostri sa reactioneze cum reactionam si noi, deoarece ne iubesc, si aceasta este cea mai mare greseala pe care o putem face. Barbatii se asteapta ca femeile sa reactioneze si sa gandeasca ca ei, iar femeile se asteapta ca barbatii sa reactioneze si sa simta la fel ca ele, cand de fapt acest lucru este practic imposibil avand in vedere valorile noastre diferite.

 

Recunosc ca am ramas si eu uluita citind acesta carte, pe care am gasit-o pur si simplu revelatoare. Trebuia efectiv sa ma opresc din citit la fiecare revelatie, si nu exagerez cand spun revelatie. La fiecare situatie expusa de autor mi se derulau in minte sute de ocazii in care ma purtasem intr-un anumit fel sau in care partenerul meu se purtase intr-un anumit fel si niciunul nu ne dadeam seama ce se intamplase sau care era problema. Un exemplu in acest sens ar fi cel in care barbatii simt nevoia sa apeleze la “Mr. Fix-it hat”, in alte cuvinte la nevoia lor de a solutiona orice problema care li se prezinta…si aceasta poate fi o reala problema cand femeia nu vrea decat sa fie ascultata, inteleasa sau imbratisata; in acest moment, tentativele lui a a-i solutiona toate problemele nu fac decat sa inrautateasca situatia si s-o irite si mai mult. In final, amandoi nu reusesc decat sa se simta extraordinar de frustrati.

 

Dar nu vreau sa dezvalui mai multe, prefer sa va las sa savurati singuri acesta carte, pe care v-o recomand tuturor cu multa caldura. Sper din tot sufletul sa-mi urmati sfatul. Eu nu pot decat sa-mi doresc sa o fi descoperit mai repede.

226 raspunsuri la “Barbatii Sunt de pe Marte, Femeile Sunt de pe Venus”

  1. Cristi VADUVA a spus:

    Si pe unde se gaseste, ai vre-un link? sau doar prin librarii?

  2. caramelushca a spus:

    Eu sincer am ‘lecturat-o’ in format audio, link nu am, dar ar trebui sa se gaseasca si pe la biblioteci.

  3. Navalitorul a spus:

    se gaseste in orice librarie decenta din Ro. Ultima data am vazut-o la Dalles, in bucuresti.

  4. Unspoken (and maybe sometimes damn good) voice a spus:

    Sau in reteaua Diverta;)

  5. Nico FM a spus:

    intr-adevar cel mai “util” de retinut mi s-a parut ideea legata reactia noastra fata de celalalt, fara a constientiza diferentele psiho/comportamentale femei/barbati, si de aici frustrari….

    Cartea poate fi descarcata de aici:
    http://80.69.83.61/digibook/index.php?dir=0%20Psihologie%20Sociologie%20/

  6. cory a spus:

    f tare cartea, si f adevarat tot ce e in ea. Si eu m-am regasit in multe din situatiile prezentate acolo. Am recomandat-o si prietenilor mei baieti. Ei au fost surprinsi cel mai mult de faptul ca atunci cand femeia se lamenteaza nu cauta sfaturi si solutii, ci doar un umar pe care sa planga. Chiar ma amuzam cand ii vedeam ce uimiti erau de asemenea descoperire :))

  7. caramelushca a spus:

    Intr-adevar, ramai surprins cand dai peste niste adevaruri de care nu erai constient. Si sa stii ca asa e, se pare ca partea asta cu lamentarea si solutionarea este cea mai surprinzatoare pentru baieti :)

  8. Dan a spus:

    Cartea asta am citit-o mai demult, când a fost publicată prima oară în România. Treaba e că, nu întotdeauna reţetele din cărţi, se potrivesc cu realitatea. De exemplu, am întâlnit bărbaţi care căutau un umăr pe care să plângă iar femeile îi timiteau la plimbare, sau femei care dădeau sfaturi în loc să empatizeze. Aşa că…

  9. monique a spus:

    ar trebui introdusa in liceu cartea asta, pt educatie. este un dictionar ar relatiilor dintre barbati si femei, fiecare trebuie sa stie interpretarile, un limbaj secret :), care de fapt e atat de usor de citit. inainte de a incepe o relatie, daca ai ganduri serioase, trebuie sa citeasca amandoi cartea, mai ales dupa anumite experiente esuate, chiar ai o revelatie! eu am dat cartea si alor mei, sper sa o fi citit

  10. PAULXX a spus:

    in primul rand ma bcur ca ma da peste acest blog si doi am citit f atent toata tema scrisa aici.desi nu stiu exact cartea si inca nu am apucat sa o caut,pot afirma ca am inteles printre pikaturi despre ce este vorba,si imi pare bine ca exista asfel de tematici si chiar sunt curios si am sa caut cartea,eventual sa o citesc si eu dar mai ales vreau sa o fac cadou iubitei mele.

  11. drasco a spus:

    Atunci cand ne descoperim intr-o carte,Camelia,nu
    descoperim altceva decat pe noi insine.Nu avem nevoie de carti,nu avem nevoie de citate,nu avem nevoie de filozofi,nu avem nevoie de reverii,oricat de minunate ar putea fi ele;singura si cea mai mi- nunata carte pe care o scrie fiecare dintre noi sunt simtirile noaste;si cu atat mai minunate vor fi cu cat in tot ceea ce facem nu punem altceva decat suflet.Asta va face ca lumea in care traim sa fie mai
    buna,asta e ceea ce trebuie sa recomandam priete-
    nilor,iubitilor/iubitelor,celor dragi si nu numai…

  12. caramelushca a spus:

    Intr-adevar, ne descoperim pe noi insine cand citim o carte, si acesta e poate cel mai mare avantaj al lecturii, deoarece cartile ne pot ajuta sa ne cunoastem mai bine printr-o inevitabila introspectie, prin identificarea cu diverse personaje sau situatii si prin constientizarea unor calitati sau defecte proprii. Aceasta este calitatea pe care o apreciez cel mai mult la o carte: nu doar sa te ajute sa descoperi ceva nou in general, ci sa te ajute sa descoperi ceva despre propria persoana.

  13. Dirtchamber a spus:

    Iti recomand “Dragostea dureaza 3 ani”. E o carte geniala. :)

  14. caramelushca a spus:

    Am s-o citesc, chiar ma tenta de ceva vreme sa citesc ceva de Beigbeder. Multumesc pentru sugestie :)

  15. cris a spus:

    as dori si eu mult sa citesc aceasta carte…..am auzit de ea dar nush pe unde o pot gasi….este un link ceva??

  16. condor a spus:

    “Nu ce intra in gura e rau ,ci ce iese” Iisus Christos
    “Cei ce cunosc ,nu vorbesc ;cei ce vorbesc nu cunosc” Lao tse -Tao
    “Words are very unnecessary” D.M.

    Duda lui Adam

    1.Se ia putin carbon,se modeleaza in timp un om,apoi i se sufla in nari suflare de viata necesara unui spirit viu.
    Compozitia se pune apoi la “copt” in ETER pentru a se putea ORIENTa.
    Respiratia-miros iriga` creatia divina,sistemul permitand patru ramificatii:vazul,auzul,gustul si pipaitul.
    Nici la stanga,dar nici la dreapta,exact la mijloc, se planteaza pomul vietii-nasul si pomul cunoasterii binelui&raului-gura.Atentie,rodul gurii,vorba este contraindicat chiar celor bine intentionati,deoarece atrofiaza intuitia,genereaza epuizare energetica,stres,calomnie,manipulare,conflicte,bla-bla,caterinca,dictatura,etc..
    La un moment dat omul adoarme.Se ia forma buzei superioare,se completeaza simetric,obtinand astfel nu o sticla de Coca-Cola cum v-ati fi asteptat,ci o…femeie!
    2.Glasul ispiteste femeia.Ea observa ca rodul gurii atrage atentia,se mesteca mai usor ca alte alimente,ar fi chiar de dorit sa dea intelepciune omului.Astfel il duce de nas pe barbatul de langa ea,care bineinteles ca pune botu` la provocare.
    Nerespectarea unicului sfat al Bunului DUMNEZEU i-a stat in gat omului si a condus, prin dezvoltarea limbajului articulat in detrimentul comunicarii telepatice,la caderea omului din rai,direct in balamucul graiului.
    3.Logos=idee,infomatie,mesaj,etc..
    4.Renumiti cercetatori ai comunicarii ,prin utilizarea celor mai moderne mijloace ale tehnicii actuale,inclusiv dispozitive de intoarcere in timp,au reusit sa reconstituie prima propozitie articulata.Scurta dar concisa ,spre surprinderea multora,aceasta a fost:”Iubitel,fii dragut si du gunoiul!”.
    5.No comment!

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